Signs from Your Record Collection That You Might Be Some Kind of Freak
by Tommy Burton and Rusty W. Spell

  • You've bought a greatest hits package because it was baited with two tracks that weren’t available anywhere else.

  • You have anything by Elvis Presley that is not a compilation album.

  • You downloaded Radiohead’s In Rainbows only to buy the store version two months later.

  • You continue to buy albums from bands you no longer like because you don't want an incomplete catalogue.

  • You bought Milli Vanilli's Girl You Know It's True at any point after they gave back their Grammy.

  • You have more than one copy of the same album because of slightly different art work.

  • You bought The Beatles’ 1 just to have the remixed tracks and their EP collection for the mono/stereo mixes, you own more than three copies of "White Album" and you've created your own single-disc version, and you have all their Christmas singles.

  • You have Morton Downey Jr. Sings.

  • You buy albums of people you don't really like just to "round out" your collection.

  • You have a preferred bootleg copy of The Beach Boys' Smile.

  • You file your soundtrack albums by the director's name.

  • You have every ABBA album and you've made your own collection of the non-hits.

  • You have both the original and the "deluxe" editions of any album, sometimes buying them at the same time.

  • You bought the Digipaks of the Peter Gabriel reissues because they were individually numbered.

  • You own Tower of Power’s entire catalogue.

  • You have Buckner and Garcia's Pac-Man Fever and the WWF's The Wrestling Album from the 80s and like more than two tracks from each.

  • You've made a compilation of B-sides and soundtrack cuts of any artist.

  • You own Michael Nesmith’s soundtrack for Timerider.

  • You've replaced your entire catalog of a particular artist with reissues.

  • You have the Ben Folds internet-only EP releases.

  • You bought Elton John’s “Candle In The Wind” Princess Diana single because it was produced by George Martin.

  • You have both As Nasty as the Wanna Be and As Clean as They Wanna Be by 2-Live Crew.

  • You bought the three disc Dylan collection just for the packaging.

  • You have more than one cast album of the same musical.

  • You have bought Christmas with the Chipmunks more than three times.

  • You own anything by John Entwistle beyond a greatest hits.

  • You sought out Paul McCartney’s Fireman and Thrillington releases.

  • You buy CDs out of the Sundazed catalogue based on the covers.

  • You have Van Morrison's Payin' Dues and it is your favorite of his releases.

  • You don’t buy greatest hits albums because you’d rather have the complete albums as they were intended by the artist, or you have every album by an artist and use them to burn your own greatest hits.

  • You have Prince's Crystal Ball, and you file The Time's Ice Cream Castle after Purple Rain.

  • You kept your original copy of 1988’s Brian Wilson because the vocal mixes were different on the reissue, and you buy any album by any artist if Brian Wilson is singing back up vocals.

  • You own more than one live Ringo Starr album.

  • You have tribute albums for artists you don't have in your collection.

  • You download every track released online by They Might Be Giants and burn them to CD.

  • You will buy a soundtrack to complete an artist's collection.

  • You bought Slint's album Spiderland because Will Oldham took the cover photograph.

  • You have The Velvet Underground's box set Peel Slowly and See as well as their separate albums.

  • You have any Violent Femmes album beyond their first one or anything by The Knack beyond their first two.

  • You own Del Shannon’s Rock On because it was produced by Jeff Lynne.

  • You made sure your copy of R.E.M.'s Green was the one with the 4s written over the Rs.

  • You burned CDs of music from the computer game The Sims.

  • You have at least twenty albums you've never heard once.

  • You don't own Michael Jackson's Thriller.

  • You own anything by Big Star.

Most (though not all) of the above are based on things that are true for either Tommy or Rusty.

Copyright © 5 Jun 2008 We Like Media
You may email Tommy Burton and Rusty W. Spell